Putrajaya Resident Evacuated, New Blueprint Proposed

In addition to 110,000 evacuees in Johor, the government today acknowledged that they also evacuated one resident from Putrajaya due to the recent floods in Johor.

Said to be suffering from occasional but severe aquaphobia, the unnamed Putrajaya resident was recently evacuated to Cebu City. “We had to do it because he was hysterical in his Putrajaya house,” said Lari bin Banjir, a national flood relieve center spokesperson. “Previously, the same resident was evacuated to Perth, but he boarded the wrong plane due to a bureaucratic error and ended up in Cebu this time,” he added.

As they care so much about their people, the government is determined to put the error behind. “We need a new blueprint to tackle our evacuation plan in line with vision 2020,” En. Lari said. In the future, the government is going to evacuate this resident to a cluster of modern cities should flood hit any part of Malaysia again. “We have identified Paris, London, San Francisco as well as Perth who did a very good job recently,” he added. However, he also added that the government hopes that by 2020, backward cities like Cebu, Harare, and Mogadishu can modernize themselves so that they can be included into the list. “At the very least, these cities should have a nasi kandar shop,” En. Lari added.

Spotted in Johor today, the now recovered Putrajaya resident was seen taking a boat tour around the flooded area. “He didn’t pay for his ride. I usually charge people RM10 for the tour, but he just walked away after we got back,” boat owner Mamat said. “Tell him this is not his boat, he must pay. My boat is made in Johor, not Turkey. How could he miss it?” he ranted.